Easter. For Christians, the best day of the year. The most important day that reshaped our history. But today, for me, Easter was a little different. I made sauce. My Papa’s recipe. The first time I have ever made sauce by myself. Papa wanted ravioli for Easter dinner. I’ve never tried before. I don’t even know if it turned out good. I never tried it.

Today we got up early. Went to church. It was great. I love our church. We lingered long in the lobby. Seeing friends. Cute little munchkins in their Easter dresses. Having serious talks about opening day and how the Red Sox are going to do this year. (its serious folks) But when we got home, Easter changed. My grandpa was in the hospital. We tried to get a hold of my aunt at the hospital, but she didn’t have service. Deb…she didn’t either. Finally we just left. Went to the hospital. He was ok. Just some fluid in his lungs, but they were on top of it. He was dehydrated and got an IV and he told me he didn’t like my nail polish color. See. Fine. So they only let two visitors in the waiting room in the ER so we rotated. I spent most of my Easter sketching in the ER waiting room. They decided he was ok enough to send home, just needed to finish some antibiotics etc, so Pete and I left. Lisa and Deb had left too because they hadn’t slept and since he was soon to be discharged, all of us waiting at the hospital didn’t seem necessary.

We were starving. Remember I made sauce? And we had bread and ravioli. All set for a beautiful Easter feast. But nothing was ready. So Pete and I stopped at a bar on the way home. Pizza and beer for Easter dinner. It was good pizza. Good beer. But Pete and I in a bar on Easter…odd. Very odd indeed.

We rented movies, and hung out at the house waiting for mom and dad to come home. Penny & Martin stopped over with dessert. They didn’t get our messages that we weren’t having dinner, so they stayed and hung out anyway. Mom and Dad were on the way home with Papa and needed the key to his house, so Penny and I brought it over. He was tired, but funny as usual. He went to the bathroom and then sat down in the kitchen. Mom asked him if he wanted some dinner or a drink or… Nope he didn’t want anything. Well what did he want to do? Play poker. So dad, Papa and Penny played a few rounds of poker. He won. Of course. He always won.

Mom, Penny and I went back home. We cooked some dinner. Chatted. Hung out. Penny & Martin went home. Dad waited for the aide to come before he left Papa’s. We watched Skyfall. Exhausted. It was a long day. About 10:30 dad got a phone call. He went and got his shoes and socks and was putting them on in the kitchen. So I yelled “Where are you going?”

“Dad?”

“What’s going on?”

“Dad died, so I guess I’m going over there”

Silence. I don’t think I moved for a good 5 minutes. WHAT. And just like that. He is gone. We were just playing poker. We were talking about opening day. Joking about basketball. Bad nail color.

But now, he is gone.

Grace.

God’s grace.

I moved home just 3 weeks ago. I didn’t know why I was moving home. But I got to hang out with Papa a few times. Precious time that I wouldn’t have had otherwise.

We all got to spent time with him today. Just our family hangin out in the ER.

My dad left before he died, so God must have known that watching him die would be too much, so he spared him that.

I have been in this family for 31 years. This Italian, sauce making family. And in those 31 years I have never attempted to make the sauce. Until yesterday. I spent the majority of my day studying my grandpa’s handwritten sauce recipe. Making his sauce. He was happy when I told him that today. I’ll never look at making sauce the same way again.

So as this Easter draws to a close. My parents are at my grandparent’s house with my aunt. Arranging things. My sister is in North Carolina. With her husband. I know it’s so hard to be away. And I feel sad for her. My brother is at a bar. And I am here. Alone. Reruns of the office playing in the background, Typing a blog post.

Easter will always be about the glorious resurrection of Jesus Christ. The reason for my faith. The most amazing day in all of history. But for me, from now on, it will always be a little bit about pizza and beer. The ER and poker. It will always be the day my funny, red-sox loving, sauce-making Papa took his final breath. I will miss him forever.

My etsy shop is now online and active. Still needs lots of improvements and work. But I took the first step. I hope you’ll stop over for a look!

Glimfeathers Etsy Shop NOW ACTIVE!!.

When I saw this blog about overnight oatmeal I loved the idea and decided to try it for myself! How great would it be to make a whole bunch of oatmeals and throw them in the fridge? Breakfast for the week! Plus its SUPER healthy. For mine I did oats, greek yogurt (non-fat, no sugar), chia seeds, almond extract, maple syrup, almond milk and black berries! Doesn’t that sound amazing? And it was so easy. I made 4 to start off (one with blueberries for my dad). It took me 5 minutes. Literally. And now they’re all in the fridge ready for breakfast tomorrow. EASY!

Here’s my recipe.

Overnight Oatmeal

Make in a cute little mason jar or small Tupperware (this makes single serve portions)

1/4 C Oats
1/3 C Coconut Milk (Could use any type of milk)
1/4 C Greek Yogurt (I used non-fat, plain)
1 T Chia seeds
1 t almond extract
1 T maple syrup (Could use agave or honey or sugar)
Fruit (I used blackberries and blueberries)

Put the oats, milk, yogurt, extract, chia seeds, and maple syrup in your container. Cover and shake until mixed. Top with the fruit. Cover. Refrigerate overnight. Enjoy!

You can make so many different versions of this. Try different milk, sweeteners, fruit, etc. A lot of times I will add cinnamon or a little brown sugar. It’s great with bananas and strawberries. You can add a little nut butter. It’s great to be creative and try lots of different combinations! I’d love to hear some of your favorites!

Here are some smilier containers. https://amzn.to/3WFMTpb

*I got the idea from this blog http://www.theyummylife.com/Refrigerator_Oatmeal They have tons of different ideas for different flavors. I can’t wait to try them all!

I had a long talk with a friend at work a few weeks ago. Just about my life. My pains. My knees. How I never feel great. I was anxious. For what? I don’t know. I was unsettled. I felt alone. She is going to school for counseling and its easy to see why. Its what’s she’s called to do. Talk to her for 2 minutes and you can see it. She has a wisdom and discernment that many people can only aspire to obtain. I sat in a chair while she washed dishes and just poured out all my frustrations. My knees always hurt. It’s so hard to go to work every day. I am in pain 24 hours a day. No one can figure it out, there was no glimmer of hope. I didn’t know what to do.

She said many important people in the bible had a time of retreat or going away. God didn’t always explain the purpose of the retreat, but it was often to remove them from everything around them and show them His true glory. To help them understand they only needed Him. He was their only hope. The Israelites wandered in the desert for 40 years, Moses went away from Egypt before God sent him back, Elisha, Elijah, Jonah was in a fish for 3 days, John the Baptist, Even Jesus was in the desert for 40 days. The theme that this has been my wilderness keeps coming up. My 7 months of retreat. Of being away. I have never experienced such pain. But I have never experienced God so fully either. I have never been humbled to the point of not being able to stand. To sitting alone for so many hours in solitude. Just me and Jesus. And its been hard. It’s hard to not be anxious or freak out or just keep asking WHY!? But slowly I see my small desire for Him growing. I see my trust getting stronger. I lean on Him a little more each day. And I think that is what He sent me away for. To remove the distractions. To have me all to himself. I’m still a long way off. I’m still figuring it out. And I’m sure there will be many, many times when I have to be humbled again. But I’m taking that first step. I’m clinging to Him tighter. I’m still in pain. I still have no answers. But I know that He does. And even if I am in pain for the rest of my life, it is only a vapor compared to the perfect, pain-free life I will be living for all of eternity.

Later that evening my friend sent me this beautiful message, along with a link to a song by Jenny & Tyler. She is one part of Kansas I will be missing…

Gina. You are a beautiful gem. The Lord so desperately longs to heal your body and heart even more. We truly are onions…we need healing one layer at a time. The Lord created a strength in you that was meant to make the powers of darkness shutter. You are created to run in freedom and joy alongside Jesus our Messiah, manifesting the Kingdom of God here on earth. Lean back into Him. Listen to His heartbeat. May your heart align even more with His. I honor you for your faithfulness to Him. He sees you. The Most High God sees You. He knows every tear you cry (Ps 56:8).

All my paperwork is in to Starbucks. The dr signed my forms yesterday and faxed them in, so now its just time to wait. I’ve done all I can do. Starbucks said they will approve/deny me sometime in the middle or end of next week. As soon as that happens, if I’m approved, I will be going back to NY! I have 2 more days of work. My knees are VERY sore, but I know I can power through 2 more days. I’m getting super sad at the thought of leaving KC though! I am going to miss Liz & Sue SO much! It’s weird to think about not living with them anymore. It’s bittersweet. I can’t wait to snuggle my puppy and hang out with my parents, see everyone at church, and make Rebecca Taylor make me waffles. Thank you all for praying. God is showing me so much and the biggest thing he is showing me is that without prayer and total reliance on him, I could do nothing.

See you soon NY.