Monthly Archives: April 2013

God of Angel Armies

29 Monday Apr 2013

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The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear him, and he delivers them.
Psalm 34:7

I’ve spoken to so many people today and the same subject keeps coming up so I can’t help but put down a few thoughts about it. Maybe it will answer some questions for you. Or maybe it will just make you more confused.

There are lots of photographs on the news or online or in magazines of the bombing. We are in a lot of them. We were a large group, so it is expected that of the 10 of us, we’d show up in a few pictures. I’m wearing a fuchsia tshirt, so I’m easy to spot. Anyway. I haven’t really looked at any of the pictures. I haven’t watched any of the news. I lived it, I don’t want to see it over and over. For me that works, for others, they want to explore every photograph and put the pieces together.

Anyway, there have been several comments that whenever we show up in a picture, there is utter chaos surrounding us, but we all look so peaceful. We are either laying patiently on the ground, or sitting calmly. In the midst of chaos, peace. And I never would have had a second thought about it, but several people have brought it up today. And I’m not ready to write about all that happened in those moments. The explosion etc, but I would like to address this one subject.

First of all, there must have been hundreds of angels all around us. The new Chris Tomlin song Whom Shall I Fear kept running through my head. “The God of Angel armies is always by my side”. So yes, I believe there were angels all around us. We were so close to the bomb, we should be hurt much worse, or even dead. Although our injuries are extensive, they should have been much worse. Second, Colton brought this up to me today. People keep asking “where was God in all of this?” Just look at the pictures. Look at the chaos and then look at me or Rebekah, or Peter or Kim or Colton. That’s where God was. We are His children, filled with His Spirit. In the midst of chaos, He WAS there. Third, I believe that God gave us so so much grace. Grace to think clearly. To know how to respond in trauma. To know to tie tourniquets. Or to coach people to breathe. Or to know how to communicate with the first responders. Not one of us lost control or freaked out.

Someday I’m sure I will look at the pictures. But I just want you to know today, that God was there. He was with us. We would not be where we are today if it weren’t for Him. And as we are experiencing more and more of His grace everyday, we are amazed and speechless and we just keep clinging to Him.

I know who goes before me
I know who stands behind
The God of angel armies is always by my side
The One who reigns forever
He is a friend of mine
The God of angel armies is always by my side

My injuries

28 Sunday Apr 2013

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Dad don’t read this.

So everyone is asking what happened to me and what’s wrong and what’s going on and how quickly I will recover, so I figured I’d explain it all as best I can.

When the bomb went off, something made a huge gash in the back of my right leg right near the bend of my knee. It is about a 9-10 inch horizontal cut. It was so deep that it severed my main artery and 2 main nerves. I lost a ton of blood. I think I got at least 4 units, but I’m not sure if I got more than that. My left leg has some cuts on it as well, but nothing that required stitches or anything. It is all black and blue and ugly with scratches and cuts, but it will heal fine. Back to my right leg. So in my first surgery they repaired my artery and cleaned it all up. A portion of my calf was also cut off/blown off? But it was small so it’s not like I’ll have a huge gap in the back of my leg where my calf should be :-). Ok so second surgery I have no idea what they did. Third surgery they reattached my nerves and closed up the wound. My entire leg is in a splint with my knee kept bent at an angle. The reason for this is so that the nerves don’t get stretched while they are trying to heal. I also have a boot on my foot. I am getting a hard cast on Tuesday and it will again be my entire leg. And I’m sure I will keep the boot on my foot.

My foot has no feeling. I have a small spot in the arch of my foot where I can feel if someone is touching me, but other than that, nothing. I also can’t move my foot or my ankle. This is because of the nerves being cut. Nerves repair at a very slow rate. In my case, since the nerve now has to “grow” from my knee to my toes, they said it will take roughly 400 days for the nerve to get all the way down. So I may not feel, or be able to move my toes for over a year. I’m not sure what this means for walking. Also, since it is my right leg this also means I may not be able to drive for over a year. Which is a very frustrating thought!

Since the nerves have been reattached I have CRAZY nerve sensations going on all in my foot and toes which is a really good sign, but still no feeling. So if you are praying for my injuries maybe this will help you be a little more specific. Pray my nerves repair way faster than expected, pray I regain feeling and movement in my foot/ankle/toes, pray that I don’t die being in a full leg cast for 8 weeks :-), and pray that my wound heals up perfectly.

Thank you all so much for the unbelievable support, love and prayers. I certainly couldn’t do any of this without you.

one day

26 Friday Apr 2013

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One day at a time. That’s all I can face. It’s a beautiful sunny day. I can’t see much out my window, but I can see blue sky. Some sweet kids from church made me a little painting with butterflies and blue skies and it had Matthew 6:25-34 written on it. My cousin Rob was curious about the verses so he looked them up on his phone and read them to all of us. Of course they are familiar verses to me. But it was good to have them read over me. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

I am moved to rehab. Kim and Colton and my Aunt Shari have gone. Slowly the visitors are dwindling down and people are returning to their normal lives. But what does that mean? Many of us will not be returning to normal life. Maybe ever. Our injuries will be with us. We may never walk normally again. We may never be the same as we were before. Even if we get to “normal” physically, these events will always be with us. And I can’t even process that yet. I don’t know what that will look like one month from now, one year from now, ten years from now. But I read these verses and I am comforted. My Father knows what the future looks like, and He tells me “do not be worried about your life.” I hope that comforts you. I hope that you can read these verses and find some peace. The road ahead is long. And will be very painful. But we can do it one day at a time.

25“For this reason I say to you, do not be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body, as to what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing?26“Look at the birds of the air, that they do not sow, nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not worth much more than they?27“And who of you by being worried can add a single hour to his life?28“And why are you worried about clothing? Observe how the lilies of the field grow; they do not toil nor do they spin,29yet I say to you that not even Solomon in all his glory clothed himself like one of these.30“But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the furnace, will He not much more clothe you? You of little faith!31“Do not worry then, saying, ‘What will we eat?’ or ‘What will we drink?’ or ‘What will we wear for clothing?’32“For the Gentiles eagerly seek all these things; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things.33“But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. 34“So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

Robert Baart

26 Friday Apr 2013

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I know you are all dying for an update on rehab and how all of us are doing since the marathon, and I promise I am working on one. But to sidestep a little, my cousin just put up a website for his art work and I just wanted to share. He lives in Boston and has been coming to visit me in the hospital often. He is one of my favorite relatives (don’t tell anyone else!) and I always look forward to visiting him and his studio over in Fenway. I have several of his pieces hanging in my room back home, and I just love how his style has changed and developed over the years and he truly is an inspiration for me and my art. Hope you take the time to click over to his web site and check out the beautiful pieces he has been working on!

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Check out Robert Baart’s artwork
http://robertbaart.com/

Rehab

24 Wednesday Apr 2013

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They tried to make me go to rehab and I said no, no, no…

Admit it, that’s the first thing that comes to your mind when you hear “rehab”. Colton keeps singing it to me.

Today should be the day. The day I leave this hospital and move to a rehab center. I have been in this hospital 9 days. I have been outside my room 1 time, besides for surgery. I have to admit that it scares me a little to go out into the real world. My hospital room is relatively safe.

Rehab has three hours of physical therapy a day. That scares me. But then I remember that Meggie and I were spending almost 3 hours a day at the Y before I came here, so I got this! We were swimming almost an hour a day and I know that is the only reason I have the upper body strength to pull myself around on the walker. God was preparing me for this long before I even knew I would need the strength.  Amazing right?

Please continue to pray for pain management for all of us. It can be extremely frustrating to be in so much pain. Also continue to pray for God’s healing in each of our lives. Lastly pray for my family members who although they were not hospitalized, still experienced as much trauma as we did and who are getting very worn traveling from hospital, to hospital, surgery, to surgery. There is no way we could make it through each day without all of your prayers. Thank you so much for your faithfulness.

Steve

23 Tuesday Apr 2013

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Today I met Steve. Steve was in the ambulance with me when we rode to the hospital. He was watching the marathon with his 4 year old son. He was hurt far worse than I. But all I remember from the ambulance ride is him holding my hand and alternating a between telling me it was going to be ok, and yelling at the medics to find his son who was now all alone. He held my hand the whole way. i have been wondering about him. How he was doing. Did they ever find his son? So today, then the nurse told me the man who rode in the ambulance with me was hoping to see me before he left for rehab, I was of course eager to see him. He came in on a stretcher, on his way out of the hospital. when he saw me tears formed in his eyes and rolled down his cheeks. I of course started crying as well. his son had been missing when we were together in the ambulance so I inquired after him first. They foun him and he only had a small scratch on his head an was fine. Thank God. And Steve? He said he was fine. But I pushed. Really fine? No. His leg was missing from the knee down. I cried even more. My leg is useless and probably will be for a very long time, but at least I have it. Steve is going to the same rehab center that I am so as he was pulled out of my room we promised to find each other. I don’t know Steve. But I know he held my hand during some off the scariest moments of my life. And for that I will be eternally grateful.

Bread & Wine: A love letter to life around the table with recipes by Shauna Niequist

09 Tuesday Apr 2013

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Bread & Wine: A love letter to life around the table with recipes

“And he took bread, and when he had given thanks, he broke it and gave it to them, saying, ‘This is my body, which is given for you. Do this in remembrance of me.’ And likewise the cup after they had eaten, saying, ‘This cup that is poured out for you is the new covenant in my blood.’” Luke 22:19-21

The last supper, the first communion. Every time we come together to break bread and drink wine, a remembrance of the gospel. A symbol of Christ’s sacrifice made on our behalf. Bread. Wine.

This book was enchanting.  Shauna accentuates the connection between bread and wine and communion and Jesus body and blood and the table and food in our everyday lives. Some of my favorite things in life are reading and cooking so imagine a book full of great life stories, and recipes! I am the type of person who will read a cookbook cover to cover and study each recipe and technique.

I loved all the elements of this book. I have read Shauna’s other two books and really enjoyed them. I love her energy, and the simplistic style of her writing. She writes so raw. So honest. So down to earth. She shares stories from her life without reservation. She’s not afraid to be vulnerable or to be human. Mistakes and all.

She shares: “What’s becoming clearer and clearer to me is that the most sacred moments, the ones in which I feel God’s presence most profoundly, when I feel the goodness of the world most arrestingly, take place at the table. The particular alchemy of celebration and food, of connecting people and service what I’ve made with my own hands, comes together as more than the sum of their parts. I love the sounds and smells and textures of life at the table, hands passing bowls and forks clinking against plates and bread being torn and the rhythm and energy of feeding and being fed.”

Most chapters ended with a recipe that tied it all together. It made me feel like I got to enjoy an amazing dish while hearing a great story. Visiting with a friend who was sharing her day with me while we ate steamy risotto, or mac and cheese, or mango chicken curry.

I also appreciated that most of the recipes in the book were healthy and included a gluten-free option.  As I try to eat gluten-free this is huge for me! There is not one recipe that I will not try. I am excited to dive into this book again and cook the recipes as I go along.  I hope you pick up a copy. Stop by the grocery store. Invite some friends over. Read these stories and cook some great food. Enjoy the bread, the wine, the fellowship, and the remembrance of what Christ has done in your life.

rise ye sunken ships

01 Monday Apr 2013

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Easter. For Christians, the best day of the year. The most important day that reshaped our history. But today, for me, Easter was a little different. I made sauce. My Papa’s recipe. The first time I have ever made sauce by myself. Papa wanted ravioli for Easter dinner. I’ve never tried before. I don’t even know if it turned out good. I never tried it.

Today we got up early. Went to church. It was great. I love our church. We lingered long in the lobby. Seeing friends. Cute little munchkins in their Easter dresses. Having serious talks about opening day and how the Red Sox are going to do this year. (its serious folks) But when we got home, Easter changed. My grandpa was in the hospital. We tried to get a hold of my aunt at the hospital, but she didn’t have service. Deb…she didn’t either. Finally we just left. Went to the hospital. He was ok. Just some fluid in his lungs, but they were on top of it. He was dehydrated and got an IV and he told me he didn’t like my nail polish color. See. Fine. So they only let two visitors in the waiting room in the ER so we rotated. I spent most of my Easter sketching in the ER waiting room. They decided he was ok enough to send home, just needed to finish some antibiotics etc, so Pete and I left. Lisa and Deb had left too because they hadn’t slept and since he was soon to be discharged, all of us waiting at the hospital didn’t seem necessary.

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We were starving. Remember I made sauce? And we had bread and ravioli. All set for a beautiful Easter feast. But nothing was ready. So Pete and I stopped at a bar on the way home. Pizza and beer for Easter dinner. It was good pizza. Good beer. But Pete and I in a bar on Easter…odd. Very odd indeed.

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We rented movies, and hung out at the house waiting for mom and dad to come home. Penny & Martin stopped over with dessert. They didn’t get our messages that we weren’t having dinner, so they stayed and hung out anyway. Mom and Dad were on the way home with Papa and needed the key to his house, so Penny and I brought it over. He was tired, but funny as usual. He went to the bathroom and then sat down in the kitchen. Mom asked him if he wanted some dinner or a drink or… Nope he didn’t want anything. Well what did he want to do? Play poker. So dad, Papa and Penny played a few rounds of poker. He won. Of course. He always won.

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Mom, Penny and I went back home. We cooked some dinner. Chatted. Hung out. Penny & Martin went home. Dad waited for the aide to come before he left Papa’s. We watched Skyfall. Exhausted. It was a long day. About 10:30 dad got a phone call. He went and got his shoes and socks and was putting them on in the kitchen. So I yelled “Where are you going?”

“Dad?”

“What’s going on?”

“Dad died, so I guess I’m going over there”

Silence. I don’t think I moved for a good 5 minutes. WHAT. And just like that. He is gone. We were just playing poker. We were talking about opening day. Joking about basketball. Bad nail color.

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But now, he is gone.

Grace.

God’s grace.

I moved home just 3 weeks ago. I didn’t know why I was moving home. But I got to hang out with Papa a few times. Precious time that I wouldn’t have had otherwise.

We all got to spent time with him today. Just our family hangin out in the ER.

My dad left before he died, so God must have known that watching him die would be too much, so he spared him that.

I have been in this family for 31 years. This Italian, sauce making family. And in those 31 years I have never attempted to make the sauce. Until yesterday. I spent the majority of my day studying my grandpa’s handwritten sauce recipe. Making his sauce. He was happy when I told him that today. I’ll never look at making sauce the same way again.

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So as this Easter draws to a close. My parents are at my grandparent’s house with my aunt. Arranging things. My sister is in North Carolina. With her husband. I know it’s so hard to be away. And I feel sad for her. My brother is at a bar. And I am here. Alone. Reruns of the office playing in the background, Typing a blog post.

Easter will always be about the glorious resurrection of Jesus Christ. The reason for my faith. The most amazing day in all of history. But for me, from now on, it will always be a little bit about pizza and beer. The ER and poker. It will always be the day my funny, red-sox loving, sauce-making Papa took his final breath. I will miss him forever.

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Vincent DiMartino
3/31/13